8.06.2004

a desperate situation.

I have lost my lap desk. This is a concern for me. It's not like losing your lap, because though laps are fickle things, they always come back. I've looked all over for my lap desk. I've even tried looking while in the sitting position, in case finding a lost lap desk is a similar in nature to finding a lost lap. No dice.

I've had my lap desk for at least ten years. It comes to mind that my lap desk was a gift or a hand-me-down from my sister Rita, because I remember her telling me how to use it. My lap, of course, was a gift from God, but he didn't really provide instructions on its use. And though I've had my lap for more than twice that, ten years is still a long time. My lap desk resting on my lap is the Sandra position of choice for doing written work. Experts say that the best way to do written work is at an actual desk, with a hard straight-backed chair, and no television, music, or any other distractions. By "experts," I mean "people who have never ever done written work or they would know better." I have done work, but never like that. The closest I have come is sitting at my desk with my feet propped on an open drawer, my lap desk in my lap. Others include sprawled out on the bed, sitting in a squashy chair, sitting on the couch, lying on the floor. And always with a lap desk, either on my lap or propped up in front of me if I'm lying down and happen to have no lap.

My lap desk was somtimes quite literally where I did written work. I used to work out algebra equations on it, or figure out how to spell words by writing the words on the desk. I used a pencil, and I would periodically take some 409 and wipe it all clean when I ran out of scratch room. Except one time, when I apparently drew a horsey with a pen or a permanent marker. I know that it was in fact a horsey, and not a pony or a mule or a bowl of fruit, because I clearly labeled it, again in pen, as a "horsey."

But now I have a perfectly good lap, and no lap desk. I've been using a book, and it is a poor substitute. It's not big enough or firm enough and it doesn't have a bean bag that conforms to the shape of my lap. And I really should not be drawing horseys on it, because it's a rental.

I cannot live like this. I cannot work under these conditions. I need to buy a new lap desk. There have been times when I almost bought lap desks at yard sales or thrift stores, just in case I ever needed an extra one. But I always stopped myself, because the idea of needing more than one lap desk with only one lap available to me seemed silly. Not so silly now, eh? So desparate is my sitatuion that I'm considering buying a lap desk retail, because you can never know when you'll next see one at a yard sale or thrift store. I console myself with the thought that maybe I can deduct the cost of a new lap desk from my taxes, since it is technically a school supply.

And when I get my new lap desk, maybe I'll draw a horsey on it, in pen or permanent marker, just for old times' sake.

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