the stupid-looking hat story.

A couple of weeks ago, Ashley and I took a shopping trip in Hickory, which, to us small-town girls, is the big city. Hickory does, after all, boast a Best Buy and a mall that is not a furniture outlet. We weren't looking for anything in particular, just something to spend some money on.

In our quest for something worth some money, we found lots of things that were not worth nearly as much money as the stores wanted in exchange for them. Namely, stupid hats. There seems to be a rash of stupid looking hats out these days, and not all of them carry the J.Lo label. Ashley and I couldn't resist, so we tried most of them on. We tried on hats that were bright red and garish and screamed, "I'm old and I'm proud of it!" We tried on hats that were checked or tan that seemed to say, "Please, sir, would you like to buy a newspaper?" Then there were those that I can only assume served the purpose of being so hideous that they were meant to distract the viewer from the hideousness of the head it covers.

But we both surely wanted a stupid-looking hat. Matching styles, perhaps, but different colors, so that we could look as silly as absolutely possible. But stupid-looking hats are expensive, and we couldn't bring ourselves to pay $10, $15, or even $20 for something we only wanted to be ridiculous. If we were going to look stupid, we wanted to do it as cheaply as possible. So no hats were ours to be found that day.

I'm sure by now you realize the end of the stupid-looking hat story. I found a pair of them at the Gap Outlet yesterday for $3 bucks a pop (though originally $16.99). I searched a pile of them for a good long time, sifting through the extra-smalls for the elusive large-sized hats; Ashley and I both have abnormally large heads. Mine is denim, and Ashley's is tan wool. They both lie somewhere between selling newspapers in 1930s London and something a train conductor might wear.

We both wore them out last night, a couple of girls in their stupid-looking hats and matching corduroy jackets (totally coincidental, I promise). We looked stupid, and we knew it, and we had a great time. And who knows, in 40 years or so, we'll probably buy the bright red ones.