room for improvement: awesome AND modest.

It's supposed to be a celebration of your determination, your drive, your will to better yourself. But no, being most improved means that you sucked in the first place, with only the slight consolation that you now don't suck quite as much as you did before. I've received a couple of most improved awards in my time, and I tell ya, I was embarrassed to accept them. I did not want it to be widely known that I had previously had so much room for improvement, whether or not that room had since been lessened. It's like now that I've worked so hard and finally managed to get away from my previous sorry state, someone has to stand up and shout, "Yeah, she's okay now, but look what a loser she used to be!" Okay, so I'm a little arrogant and short-sighted, but I am working on improving that.

There is also the idea that a improvement award is kind of a throwaway. It's the sort of award you give to the fat kid with the good attitude or the girl who is about to graduate after a long, faithful, and entirely mediocre career. However, at my high school, the sports teams had an award called the "Coaches' Award" that covered the base of recognizing someone who didn't really help the team, but was very likeable. That way, they could save the actual improvement awards for calling attention to one's prior flaws.

Are there people who celebrate their own improvement? I suppose I do, but I prefer to do so in a private environment, namely, my own head. I prefer everyone to focus solely on my current staggering achievement and not even know how far I'd come. Let them simply compliment me now, so that I may thank them nicely and then thank heavens that they don't know the truth. Maybe I'll even make a modest reference to my prior incompetence, but then they will just not believe me, because how could one who is now so fabulous ever have been anything but? And then they'll think I'm awesome AND modest! Score!

And yet for all my arrogance, I do believe that improvement should be celebrated, because it in fact is determination, drive, and a will to better onself. It is even an inspiration to those who continue to wallow in their own shortcomings. So maybe it should be changed to some kind of determination award, one that focuses on overcoming obstacles instead of an initial lack of quality. No one has to know that the obstacles were your own stupidity or lack of coordination. Let the masses believe that you came through successfully, despite external exigencies, not internal inadequacies. Let the masses believe that you're awesome AND modest. Score!