the one.

"Don't ever settle. Ever. Ev-ver."

Somehow I'm now being lectured about marriage by a woman who is not related to me and who doesn't even know me all that well, but sees an opportunity to pass along some knowledge that she learned the hard way. This whole conversation came from my retelling the story of my sister calling me an old maid.

"Don't ever marry someone unless you are sure he is the one for you. If you have any doubts, drop him. I mean, you can keep him around for entertainment or whatever, but don't marry him. And if you end up marrying him, don't ever have children with him, because it's impossible to get rid of him then."

I'm beyond the point of interrupting and saying that keeping someone around "for entertainment" is a pretty terrible thing to do to someone who might not realize it. But I'm not about to disagree with her. I'm not even married, what do I know?

"There is one person out there for you. One. One person that can make Sandra whole. And if you marry someone else and then you meet that one, you got problems. A lot of people say that there are lots of people who you could be happy with, but no. There's only one."

I disagree. I disagree strongly, because I'm analytical, not romantic. I'm in the group that says that there are lots of people out in this world who, given the right time and situation, could make Sandra very happy indeed. You know what? Maybe there's even one who is the most compatible, if you could quantify such things. But I don't know that I could tell the difference between the guy with a compatibility quotient of 98.2 and the guy with 98.15.

But my opinions do not matter here. I'm not married and I've not been in the trenches. Don't believe in soul mates? You've obviously not met yours. Her eyes are wide and clear and serious and I know to shut up, because she's been waiting on a young woman to save from a marital cage. Even if I don't believe in soul mates, I know that she does, because she's met hers already, but too late.